The Things No One Tells You: On Sick Leave

So my friend, and fellow blogger, Bethany mentioned to me last week that she was putting together a collection of mommy bloggers out there to talk about mothering insights, etc. It got me thinking, and I decided to start a blog series entitled: The Things No One Tells You. Because I feel like, especially as a mom, there are just so many things you walk into blindly. After I had my first child, I wondered how I managed to get so much advice about some things, but then there were so many that no one ever told me about. I intend on addressing some of those things, and hopefully shed some light on dark topics.

Whenever you start a new job, they always have an employee manual that tells you how much vacation time, personal days and sick leave you have. That is not the case for motherhood. And do you know why? Because...there isn't any. It's true there are a lot of company perks to being a mom, countless actually and the perks far outweigh the negatives. But when you're a mom, especially a stay-at-home mom, there just aren't any days you're actually allowed to be sick.

Today I woke up with my kids, a typical Monday morning. They were hungry, needed diaper changes and the list of demands started. The only problem was, I was up all night throwing up. Still unable to keep food down, I had to take care of them while the husband went to work. It sucks. Because you are at home every day, and because your kids get used to giving you their morning demands, it makes no sense to them why you've suddenly baracaded the bathroom door and are making strange noises in there. They pound on the door, and cry and then push each other over because they're each fighting to get into the bathroom. Ofcourse then an argument and full-blown wrestling match starts and you're attempting to referree from the inside of a toilet. Or better still, it's quiet...too quiet. And when you finally gain enough energy to walk out of the bathroom, you only discover the toilet paper all over the floor, the garbage strewn all over the house, your favorite lipstick on the walls and a very guilty looking two year old standing there grinning. Right, just what you needed. But you continue on, because you have to. It's all part of the job.

Also weekends can be very confusing as well. It's Saturday morning...ahhhhh.... what a wonderful thing right? Well, not really for you. Because you see, it's the weekend for your husband, not for you. You still have to get up with the kids like every other day and do the routine. It's not to say that your husbands a bad guy, it's just that your kids are used to waking YOU up each morning, so they do. And suddenly Saturday morning turns into every other morning. Shoot it could be a Tuesday for all you know.

This is the thing no one ever told me. I never realized that when I had children I would be sacrificing my ability to vomit in peace, or to sleep past 7am. I wish I had known that, so that I could at least have been more prepared for it. I know that one day I will spend my sicktime alone, with no one there to scream at me. Ofcourse, there will also be no sweet voice asking "Are you okay mama?" and there will be no gentle 3-year-old to sit on my lap and tell me "It's okay mama, I take care of you." These are the sweet things nobody tells you that being sick brings.

One day I will sleep in all day, maybe have a nice brunch, go for a walk in the park, enjoy a leisurely weekend. But there will be no exuberant 2-year-old who bursts through the door and says, "Mo-nin' Mama!" or "Mama, you up? I so happy!". These are the things about weekends nobody tells you about.

It's those tender moments, those tiny voices that keep you going when the lack of vacation and sickdays take their toll.