I will try

I just found out today that someone who used to be a very good friend of mine became a daddy on May 14th. Do you know how I found out? I had to google him. It's father's day, and he's a dad.... and I can't even tell him how happy I am for him.

How do we get to this point? How is it that you can go from knowing someone so well, divulging your life to them, being vulnerable about your hopes and dreams and fears and disappointments to never hearing from them again? I hate it when people say it's because we grow up and move on. The thing is, yes we do grow up, yes we do move on. But do we not still have hopes and dreams and fears and disappointments? Just because they change, doesn't mean we can no longer share them. Cominalities fade, but basic human principles never leave.

I had a few friends, people whom I cared about dearly. We talked, we laughed, we blared music loudly in the car and danced like freaks- then one day we stopped talking. I dunno why, we just stopped.We lost touch.. moved to different places, changed addresses, phone numbers and even email addresses without ever telling the other person.

And now, the only way I can ever know what is going on in their lives is by googling them. My heart is sad cause..... I miss them. I genuinely screwed it up I think... just by not picking up the phone and calling. And now, it's too late. They're gone.

I have often said that when I am old and have alzheimer's I will feel terribly bad for my family, because I know that my brain will go back to my friends. To the time when we were carefree. To the time of Noah, Matt, David, Mikyla, Beccy and Gee.

I will leave you with the words of Coldplay:

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try and fix you