Just Dance

I love to dance. Please understand, I have absolutely no talent when it comes to dancing. I never took lessons as a kid, in fact dancing was prohibited for the most part in my childhood. My dance moves are seriously lacking, and I'm quite certain that I probably look ridiculous 90% of the time. But there comes a point in your life, well maybe there just came a point in mine, when you really don't care what other people think; you just need to have fun and let loose.

When I was a sophomore in college, I had a roomate who was a little eccentric. One day, she had had a particularly bad time and I thought I would walk in my room to find her crying on the floor, instead I opened the door to find her dressed in nothing but a bra and underwear (oh also there was a feather boa) dancing on top of my bed to a Britney Spears song. I watched her in skepticism, what was she DOING? It was her answer that changed my outlook on things permanently. She said, "I had a bad day, so I thought, instead of pumping my body full of meds, or bawling uncontrollably, that I would dance. I'm just gonna dance it out until I can't stop smiling." Wow. So simple. And with that little gem of wisdom, was born my love of dance.

This year I have found myself in a serious funk. Walking through this unbearable grief and sadness can be so overwhelming. It feels like it's never ending, and with every season, it just brings more sad. But I've also noticed a major increase in my desire to..... dance.

When I'm unloading my dishwasher.... I'm dancing. When I'm putting away my clothes...dancing. Picking up the kids from school everyday.... so much dancing. I'm dancing to 90's music, I'm dancing to radio music, I dance sometimes to the music that's only in my head. I find that I can barely go a day without it. Is it ridiculous? Oh totally. Do I look dumb? Probably. But I also feel so much better when I'm done.

Dancing has also become worshipful. I know what you're thinking: the CMA pastor's kid dances in worship? Yup, I've developed a little pentecostal in me (must be my husband's influence). I find in my own home I dance and I sing and I cry and I belt out songs to Jesus. It is so freeing to not care what anyone else thinks, and to know it's all for my King.

When bad things happen, some people take prescription meds. Some people stop showering, eating, or living. When crisis hits, some people crack under the pressure. I just dance. I dance in my pajamas, I dance in my nicest clothes. Sometimes I dance when I'm not wearing any at all. It doesn't matter what you wear, or what people think, or how many moms stare at me when I'm dancing like a chimpanzee in my minivan as I pull up to my son's school. What matters is.... I'm happy.

So the next time you feel a wave of sadness, when life becomes messy and uncontrollable. When you feel like maybe you just might crumble, turn on some music and just wildly dance.