Wednesday, January 19, 2011

The Mommy Know-it-Alls


So, the first time I was pregnant it started. I would say something like, "Man...I'm so uncomfortable" and inevitably someone would come up to me and say "Oh just wait till you're 9 months pregnant... THEN you'll know what uncomfortable is."
Everytime there would be an ache or pain I would complain about, some wise cracking mom would say, "Just WAIT until labor, then you'll have something to complain about."
It really started to annoy me. But I figured, once I had a child, things would be different and I would be accepted into "the club". Ofcourse, there was labor... which I would like to think 17 hours would qualify me but there were the really snitty women who would say, "Oh, well you had a C-section... so you don't really know what giving birth is like."
When I became a part of the club, the mommy-know-it-alls didn't stop there. First it was, "Oh you have a baby... just wait until they're 2!" Then it was, "Oh you only have one child, just wait until two!" Then it was, "Oh you only have boys, just wait until you have a GIRL!"

Now here I am, 3 kids deep. I thought I had the corner market over the mommy-know-it-alls. I mean, who could top 3 kids in 3 years? Well, just last week, I found one. "Oh yeah, you should try doing all that and working FULL TIME."

Ugh, why do people feel the need to trudge on what is OBVIOUSLY a difficult thing and make it so that their story is always so much worse? I don't know. But what I do know is, so help me GOD, if you EVER catch me saying, "Oh just wait until...." please slap me. It's rude, it's annoying, and it trivializes the hardships of others.

GAH- there I said it!

6 comments:

the princess said...

That would be very annoying. People suck sometimes. Sorry hon :( For what it's worth, you seem like super-mom to me. I can't imagine taking care of three young kids all at once. :)

Rachel said...

I totally agree...it makes me feel so unsure of myself and that I'm not doing things right. I feel like there are so many moms out there that tell you what you "should" be doing with your kids in regards to eating, sleep, etc, and are NOT very nice about it...like you are a horrible mom if you don't do those things also. Yep...it isn't fun being in the "mommy-world" at times...but God gives us grace!! I think 3 kids in 3 years is amazing too!!!

Tracey Jacobsen said...

for the record -- you've got the market cornered. ;)

to those who say you don't know what it feels like to give birth... grrrr... I will refrain from listing all the ways you could one-up them.

Sarah May said...

when I was working in preschools I would get this kind of garbage daily... only because I wasn't a parent yet. I finally just started saying things like "at least you don't have 24 two year old to feed lunch to... and I get to go home alone at the end of the day, lucky me!"

Some of the moms at the daycare I work at still try to trump me... I don't care anymore... I just let them win by saying "you are such a supermom I can't even imagine" and leave it at that.

Everyone has their own person crap to deal with on top of being a parent. Personally, I see working full time as a get away. I have done both, even the full time student deal while being a parent... being a full time stay at home Mom trumps it all!

Erin you are an inspiration and I don't know how you do it... I find myself loosing my sanity with just one child, in less than 4 months I will have TWO... I am terrified!

imaya said...

HA these people are so stupid cause 1) being a stay at home Mamma is WAY harder, cause no breaks, no paid sick days, nothin. Being a stay at home mama with 3 very young children gets you a gold star for complaining when ever you want.
2) 17 hours of labor and then a c-section is worse case birth story scenario cause you get the worse of all of it. You get the INCREDIBLE pain of 17 hours of labor, plus the abnormal surgery and you have to freakin recover from both of them.
3) And as for all the rest-good gracious why not just validate that some is going through a difficult time! Seriously why the need to one up everything? I feel like I seriously have no need in my life for one uppers. They suck.

As far as you go, you are amazing. You take each struggle and our honest with the difficulties and yet you seek a way through it that is positive and encouraging. You go, Erin!

Anonymous said...

You said this so nicely. I forbid myself to rant on my blog because it will just get ugly.

Maybe one day all of us moms will be more of a support network instead of other individuals we can measure ourselves against.