An SPD tale

Today, my best friend asked me to go on a playdate with her at the Sundial Bridge. It was a beautiful sunny day and I had all three kids with me. I thought, "Why not?" So I packed them all up, and met my friend and her kids at the bridge. The instant I put Olivia in the stroller however, is when things took an unpleasant turn. You see, Olivia does not like new things. The world is scary to her and the sun being so bright and the bridge being so wobbly, really freaked her out. So, she screamed the entire length of the bridge. While I tried, unsuccessfully, to gab to my friend and talk to the boys about the fishermen and the ducks and the airplanes we saw, Olivia screamed on. It was at about the 7 minute mark of thrashing and ear piercing squeals that a steady stream of people began to glare at us. I couldn't handle the "will somebody shut that baby up" stares anymore and made a general announcement to the crowds. "YES, we're all miserable."

As I sat down with Liv beside the river and we watched all the children throw rocks into the rushing water, on and on she cried. She scratched, and hit and threw a very loud tantrum. What could I do? I wasn't going to rob the other children of their fun. So I sat there and held, and comforted and kissed and cuddled and waited for a peace. It eventually came, though under much protest. And my sweet friend apologized for making us come out and play when it was so obviously agitating Olivia. It would be easier to not go anywhere. To just sit in the house and let her be in a controlled, familiar environment, where the tantrums are limited. But, that isn't life is it?

I wish I could tell the glaring people, the grandmas at the grocery store who tell me I should feed my baby, the well meaning moms who give me pitied looks, and the angry childless people who can't be bothered by the noise about my sweet Olivia. I wish they could know her like I know her. How she always wakes up with a giant smile on her face and greets me with a "Good moanin'" when I pick her up. I wish they could see how funny she is, how tender she can be when she leans in for a hug or gives a big kiss on the lips. I wish they could hear how much she talks and how easily she plays with her rough and tumble brothers. But this is something the world doesn't see. It's not something I can explain to every person on the bridge that stared at me today. And that's okay, we'll keep going there, keep pushing those limits and one day, maybe not too long from now, everyone will know the amazing little girl that I know.