I am

It's raining outside today, gloomy kind of depressing. And, in my ever-need to find myself, I popped an old CD in the system for easy listening. But, today the words spoke so much to me.

But let me back up....
This week has kind of blindsighted me. A near and dear friend of mine called it quits with me, and it has affected me in the most bizarre way. I have really been grieving that loss I guess, when I stumbled on this song. I have forgotten the person who is the historian of my life.

This was the song I heard:

Pencil marks on the wall, I wasn't always this tall

You scattered some monsters from beneath my bed.

You watched my team win, you watched my team lose

You watched when my bicycle went down again

And when I was weak unable to speak, still I could call you by name. 

And I said, elbow healer, superhero, come if you can.

And you said I am. 

Only 16 and life is so mean, what kind of curfew is at 10pm?

You saw my mistakes, you watched my heart break

You heard when I swore I'd never love again.

And when I was weak, unable to speak still I could call you by name.

And I said, heartache healer, secret keeper, be my best friend.

And you said I am.

You saw me wear white, by pale candlelight

I said forever to what lies ahead.

To kids and a dream, with kids that can scream

Too much it may seem when it is 2am

And when I am weak, unable to speak, still I will call you by name.

Oh shepherd, savior pasture maker ... hold onto my hand

And you said I am.

And it was then that I realized.... that he is.